Sunday, December 27, 2009

My vice principle

When I first started work, my Vice Principle had me sit down with her and enjoy a snack of tea and tok. She then started to tell me what to expect of the Korean children at our school in broken English. She told me to not be offended by the children because they like to touch each other, and will probably want to get their filthy swine flue ridden hands all over me. That really did not turn out to be true. The only time one of the kids have touched me is when one little girl poked me in the belly. I guess she wanted to see if I giggled like the Pillsbury dough boy.

She then told me to be very careful about touching the kids. I really did not think that was a problem. I have no desire to touch these kids at all.

"You be vely calfur about the touchee."

"Oh I dont think that will be a problem." I have no desire to touch children, I dont even hug the ones I got at home. I just wave at them from across the room, that's good parenting.

"In the news, I saw a teacher get fired. He touch a gilr on hip."

"Wow, he only touched her on the hip?" That seemed pretty harsh to get fired for just an accidental hip touching.

"Yes it vely big scandal, he get filed onry fol touchee on hip."

"That is terrible, I will be very careful about that." I said, now scared out of my mind about even brushing up against a child.

"Yes, he chase her, he ran aftel her vedy faah and he touch her hip."

So the dude actually ran down a terrified 13 year old, so he could rub his jinro soaked hands on the poor child's hips. Ok, maybe the dude should be fired.

I was more than a little insulted that my VP, who had known me all of 3 days, thought there was a chance that I might be running down her students and touching their hips. I know I might be a filthy foreigner, but it falls within the realm of common sense not to molest my students. You don't shit where you eat.

Of course other schools are fair game.

Dave is a filthy hip touching foreigner, and all the mods at the ESL cafe have a hip touching fetish as well.

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