Bad students

During one of my third grade classes my co-teacher called on a pair of students to read a simple dialogue, in Englishee. The students stared at my co-teacher, then at their books. They looked at me and looked at their books. They looked at my co-teacher, and then looked at their books. My co-teacher told them to read the dialogue in Korean. The students stared at my co-teacher, then at their books. They looked at me and looked at their books. They looked at my co-teacher, and then looked at their books.

I told them what to say. My co-teacher told them what to say. The students around them, tried to help them, but still they looked totally confused, and stayed mute. I told them to sit down and practice, I would call on them again later. I was annoyed, the class seemed to prefer talking in Korean to practicing the dialogue, I was use to this by now, but for some reason decided to make an example out of this pair. I called on the other students to do the dialogue, and no matter how terribly they did it, I gave them candy.

We practiced another dialogue; I told the students that they would perform it. I told them exactly what to say. I gave them 5 minutes to work on it in pairs. I then called on them to read the dialogue.

The students stared at my co-teacher, then at their books. They looked at me and looked at their books. They looked at my co-teacher, and then looked at their books. My co-teacher told them to read the dialogue in Korean. The students stared at my co-teacher, then at their books. They looked at me and looked at their books. They looked at my co-teacher, and then looked at their books.

This time I was angly. “You are in Englishee Class!” I yelled. “When I tell you to practice a dialogue in English, you better practice the fucking dialogue!” I told the students to sit down and practice the dialogue, I that I would call on them each time until they got it right. They sat down, faces red with embarrassment.

I called on more students and gave them candy. I wrote the next dialogue on a white board, I yelled at the entire class to practice the dialogue. I called on the same pair of students, and they did the blank stare routine again. “How the hell are you not getting this?” I yelled. “I wrote it down, I told you exactly what to say! Its only two sentences!” I warned them that I would call on them every fucking class until they finally figured out how to practice the dialogue. I had my co-teacher translate into less angry Korean, so there would be no misunderstanding. Then I dismissed the class.

After the class both my co-teacher and I stood there shaking our heads. “What the hell is their problem?” I asked him. “Could I have made myself any clearer about practicing the fucking dialogue?”

“Oh don’t brame self.” He told me. “Out of the entire plovence they score da rowest. Our schoor getting special funding for da student. Da plincipar say don’t feel bad if dey no rean anything, dey retarded.”

“Why the hell did you wait until now to tell me that?” Because now I feel like a real asshole.